Some theories on what feels like a never ending early labor.....

Well, here I sit another week later without a new baby.  Twelve days until my official due date.  It feels so far away with my body feeling like it’s ready to go.  I had an OB appointment on Wednesday and was happy to hear of the progress of things after an assessment.  Baby super low, cervix softening, 2-3 cms dilated, and measuring almost 40 weeks for size.   It would seem that my body is prepared and ready....but perhaps the baby is not. 

Actually, I have been working on a theory that there must be 3 factors in line for labor to begin.  My body must be ready, my baby must be ready, and I must be ready.  I feel like last week, my body and baby were ready to go, but I wasn’t super prepared or ready, and that threw things right off.   Currently,   I feel like my body is good to go!  But, I feel like the baby and I are at odds with the timing of this.   You see, for the past few nights, I have been trying several random natural induction things.  The problem is, that these are all much easier to do consistently when the kids go down for the night.   It’s hard to escape the kids to pump on and off for good chunks of the day.  I feel nervous about going for a long hard walk with all of them in the event I did bust.... SO, I have been experimenting in the evenings, but then realizing I am totally exhausted and have NO DESIRE to go into labor through the night again!

Janna and Robyn were both “through the night” labors, and it was just so depressing and exhausting compared to Jesse.  With Jesse, we woke up fresh and rested and were checked into a sunny hospital room by 11 am, and along came he at 4pm.  It was so much nicer and easier than arriving at the hospital when it’s dark and quiet and everyone on their shifts seems exhausted, and YOU have this tremendous amount of work to do on no sleep.    I really want a daytime labor this time around.  Pretty please.... 

So, in the evenings as I have some time to try and get the contractions rolling (Which doesn’t take too much in the evenings),  I literally have been STOPPING mid tracks and jumping into bed to get some rest.   Last night, I put in about 30 minutes on an exercise ball, and felt some crazy “motion in my ocean” in the words of a friend.   I then realized it was 9:00, and I was pooped from the day, and I really didn’t WANT to spend the next several hours walking or bouncing.  And so, I just abruptly put it away and went to bed.  I always hope that I’ll wake up early in the morning and things will kick-start, but I think my baby is more of a night owl, and wants to appear then!

This little bean has a party every night from about 10-midnight.  I really feel like he/she is trying to flip over breach every night, and I spend the first couple of hours of the night taking deep breaths with the discomfort of crazy movements and some contractions that hit with all the movement.   I finally fall asleep, and then have been waking up magically at 4 am each morning feeling queasy and hungry, and anxious....  and unable to fall back asleep.  Once the day officially starts with the kids, I am just so wiped, that I have no desire or energy to head out for that walk or try and get things rolling.  And when I do have the urge and time, contractions are just not starting up during the day time so much!

Perhaps I just need a good sleep and a weekend where Dave can watch the kids, and I can focus on encouraging this baby to agree that the day time is totally ok.  OR.... Maybe I need to just cave and go with a night time labor??

All of this, obviously, seems a bit much.  The last few weeks of pregnancy really does make you crazy!  Truly.

I do have a much more sane and obvious answer to all my bodily action and no baby.  And the answer is my toe nail polish color has NOT been right.  You see, I have been sporting  a bright yellow nail polish color for almost a month now.  Not knowing the gender, I thought yellow seemed like an appropriate color to sport.  However, with Jesse, it was blue, and the girls got pink.  Perhaps this baby is NOT satisfied with such a gender neutral welcoming color!      So, today, with MUCH effort, I switched to a nice soft and shimmery purple.  Perhaps this will work if it’s a girl in there!    If I still have no baby in a week, I’ll switch to a blue or green I think.

I am slowly going crazy.......

Well, I am off to catch the end of the kids naps.  A friend swung by this morning to watch the kids and     sent me for a bath and nap and to relax for a couple of hours.  True friendship I tell you, those who come over and send you to bed when you REALLY need it!  Actually, I have had a few reprieves like that this week, and it’s been AMAZINGLY helpful with my 4 hours of sleep most nights, and preserving my sanity with the kids.  Who, really, are great kids...but busy and talkative, and just don’t understand that climbing on my stomach REALLY hurts at this point, and every spill they make and squat I have to take feels mildly torturous.   And asking me a hundred times each day if the baby can come today, doesn’t REALLY help move anything along.   SO, I have REALLY appreciated all the END- OF- PREGNANCY- FEEL- LIKE- I- COULD- BLOW –ANY- SECOND help.

With that, I am off to catch a few more zzzz’s.....Thanks for reading! I’m out. 

Baby 4 is keeping me on my toes!

Well, it’s been one heck of a past 48 hours, and I think I just experienced my first false labor ordeal.

In my past 3 labors, I felt pretty confident and sure of myself.  Sure I had lots of Braxton hicks, and the odd question of, “could I be in labor” a few times the week before each child arrived, but nothing where I went into the hospital or called for back- up, or packed a hospital bag unnecessarily.  In fact, they were all pretty normal early labors, “ text book” I’d say.   My contractions would start as mild and gradual, and then become closer and more intense, and then they’d hit the point I just knew that I’d need to head into the hospital.  I’ve told friends expecting their first child, “Oh- you’ll just KNOW!”

Well, on Tuesday I didn’t feel the greatest.  A bit under the weather and tired.  By supper I was having cramps and contractions fairly close together, and I thought,” THIS IS IT!”  They felt like real contractions with back pain and cramping and close and consistent.    But, then they’d slow a bit, then pick up again.  I knew that the inconsistency of them probably meant it wasn’t the real deal, but it sure felt REAL!  I was exhausted by ten pm with the uncertainty and strain, and noticed they were slowing down a good amount when laying down, so I just decided to try and fall asleep and see what the night and early morning might bring.

I slept great until 5 am, then woke up just wide awake with more dull pain and cramps and feeling VERY off and awful.  However, I didn’t have any contractions.  So, after considering everything decided to take on the daycare kids, send Dave to work, and see what the day would bring.  By 8 AM, I regretted my decision, as I was having contractions 2-3 minutes apart, long and painful.  I put all the kids in front of the TV, and moaned away trying to time them and decide my plan of action.  After about 30 minutes of this,   I decided to call the hospital and see what they thought I should do.

After talking to a nurse on the phone, she advised I come into the hospital to be assessed.  She said not to rush, but to get child care arranged and leave within an hourish. SO, I called Dave home from school.   He got home in  10 minutes flat, and pumped out some lesson plans for his supply while I called parents to pick up kids, and arranged childcare for my own, and  finished up packing my bag.   This with many pauses on the staircase or floor to breathe through a contraction, etc.   By the time everything was lined up a bit over an hour later, my contractions were spacing out to about 5 minutes apart and were less intense.  We headed into the hospital, and got checked into an assessment room pretty quickly. 

Sure enough, the monitors registered contractions 5 minutes apart, but they got less and less intense over the 2 hours I was there.   I expressed my pure uncertainty as to whether this was true or false labor to the nurses.  I would swear I was in labor one minute because of the pain and intensity, and then have nothing for a while.  I have never been early, and that was also a big question mark.   I had a great seasoned nurse, who assured me that 4^th babies were always “tricky” in their timing and very rarely seemed to follow textbook patterns.  It was both reassuring and scary to hear.  Finally, they checked my dilation, and although a few cms (which is normal for somebody who has had a few kids) they thought I was a bit too high and hard, and that my cervix was not currently, “laboring.”  They sent me home and said to relax, have a bath, go for a stroll.  Perhaps it would pass, or progress.

Oh man! I felt so devastated.  It was so much stress and work making all those plans to get the kids and Dave’s classes covered,  and then to be sent home!  I felt bad for all the people who just reorganized their life for me.   I cried on and off the whole van ride home, all the while experiencing random painful contractions here and there, and still feeling like I was in labor!    I arrived home to confused kids, and some friends who were hanging out with them.  They offered to stay the night and next day or 2 in the event I was just in super early labor, and also just to ease my load and help out.  The workload of my life feels a bit unmanageable at this point, and the stress of wondering if I was in labor, made me readily accept.  

After a relaxing afternoon rest and bath,  I got up and had a cup of tea, and by 4pm, was certain I was in labor.  I was having contractions 2-3 minutes apart that I had to breathe and sway through, and bolt to the bathroom for, thinking the pressure might bust my water!  This went on for a little over an hour, and I was feeling so thankful the kids were in good hands, and that Dave was available.....and then it just STOPPED!  Totally stopped.  For an hour. Nothing!  I had a few more hours of milder ones 5-10 minutes apart, but by 9 felt totally exhausted from the day, and went to bed to see if I could sleep.   

It was the strangest sleep last night!  I slept hard and well, except for every hour or 2, I would have the most intense contraction from nowhere.  It wake me up out of the blue and would make me JUMP out of bed, and lean forward and grasp onto the corners of the bed and holding in my breathing and moaning as best I could from the snoring Dave.  They would last a minute, and then I’d just get my feet under me and brace myself for another one....and there would be NOTHING!  Not even a Braxton hick! 

So, this morning the same pattern has followed.   I woke up feeling heavy and having some back pain and dull sort of aches.  But all that has happened is every few hours out of nowhere a contraction hits like a log, and then nothing follows.  I did meals and homeschooling  with the kids today, and the lovely Sarah Guindon has been hanging out with them otherwise.  I had a great afternoon nap, and since then haven’t had BOO!  Nilch.  Nada! Zero. 

So, I feel entirely confused and somewhat frustrated, and I think it may have been a false alarm?  Or, maybe I am going to have a very long drawn out early labor for a few days?  I am VERY thankful to have Sarah staying with us until tomorrow, and so my mind is much more at ease currently as I write this. 

Although, I must say I feel terrified my body just did a lot of prep- work for the real deal, and when labor does come, it will be fast and furious, but I won’t believe it’s real, and then I’ll have a baby in the van!   I’m feeling uncertain if I should be in “labor go” mode....or just forget about the past 48 hours, and pretend nothing will happen until my due date!  I have friends all signed up for different shifts the 2 weeks surrounding my actual due date who are able to come quickly to relieve me....but should I try and put plans in place in the meantime?  Oh, I just don’t know.  Taking it one day at a time is hard.

Taking things one day at a time is hard when you are super pregnant.  Really hard.  Trying to keep my chin up.   Thanks for reading, and weigh in on your guess for my due date on my facebook page.  Date and Time!  That will be fun to see.  I’m out!

So, that is where I am at!